Since opening Congruence Counseling I’ve noticed that the first question people often ask is why the name “Congruence”. So it seemed natural to make my first blog post the answer to that question, “Why Congruence Counseling?”.
Throughout my life I learned, for various reasons, as we all do, to focus on my outward image and did not spend much time worrying about the person on the inside. I had a good career, a nice house, and great friends, but I wasn’t happy. I came to the conclusion that I was just one of those people who would never be happy, never be content, never be satisfied. Then I was introduced to the concept of congruence, and the world opened up to me. I was not only able to find happiness, but also meaning, and a second career along the way.
Congruence as a psychology term, according to Carl Rogers, refers to one’s ideal-self matching their actual behavior. In other words, feeling as though the person portrayed to the outside world is the same as, or congruent to, the person or feelings experienced on the inside. Carl Rogers, the father of client-centered therapy, believed that without congruence one would not be able to reach full life potential.
I am certainly not an expert on Carl Rogers, or person-centered therapy. I actually take a more integrative approach and pull techniques and theories from multiple schools of thought depending on my client, but this was a concept that spoke to me. Moreover, incongruence or the lack of congruence, can cause anxiety, depression, shame, guilt, the list goes on. I agree with Rogers, congruence is key. It would be virtually impossible for someone to feel content in life and find meaningful happiness, when they are also feeling incongruent.
This concept, congruence, not only helped me change my life, and myself but also inspired me to help others do the same. I’ve known from the moment that I set the goal of having my own practice; the word congruence would be incorporated. Therefore, Congruence Counseling seemed like the perfect fit.
Now how does all of this apply to YOU?
Well maybe it does, and maybe it doesn’t. Perhaps you are at a point in life where you are content, fulfilled, happy, and satisfied. If so, nice work, I am genuinely excited for you. But perhaps you are not. Do you feel anxious, depressed, lonely, or empty? Have you faced a loss, recently or even years ago, that still feels unsettled? Are you struggling, or know someone who is having a hard time?
If so, I’d like to help. Maybe not now, it might now be a great time for you, but is it EVER a good time? Aren’t you, or your loved one, worth the effort? I’m available for individual and family sessions; there is no obligation or expectation. Come in and talk, if it doesn’t feel right to you, I will help you find a better fit either at Congruence Counseling, or somewhere else.
I honestly just want to help, and give back to my community. I was born and raised in the North Hills, I’m raising my family here, and my practice is here. I am heavily invested in the well being of this community, its families, and its people.
Have questions or topics you’d like me to explore? Send me a message; I want to hear your thoughts.
By Katherine Biggs, MSCP